Word Slinger

I recently read something on avoidance that rang a smidge close to home. I think people avoid things to keep from having to face something uncomfortable, scary. Inadequacies. I avoid paying my utilities until I can’t any longer because paying my bills forces me to balance my checkbook. Or transfer money. Which reminds me of the fact that I’m a compulsive spender. That I never have enough money. That I want a new expensive make-up brush but I shouldn’t get it because my truck registration is due. That I want to take a weekend trip but I have to get my heater fan in my truck fixed. Because if I don’t pay the power bill right away, I won’t have to feel the anxiety of feeling like I should be doing better; that I’m the only one still standing at the START line.